It is so HARD to forgive!

" . .walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called,  with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love,  eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. . . And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.  Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.  Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you."   From Ephesians 4 (ESV)

How come people we love so much can be so downright mean -- people in the Church, our neighbors, even our own family members?  And why is it that we can so easily look at ourselves, lick our wounds, and think everything is the other person's fault? In other words, why is it so hard to forgive others and so EASY to excuse ourselves?

You know what I think? I think it is because we have a very poor understanding of grace and a very faulty understanding of our own unworthiness for the very least of the favors God sends our way daily. May I tell you a little story?

Years ago my little nephew was raking up fall leaves at their home by the lake. Believe me, there are a lot of maples up there and the carpet of leaves seems endless. He was working hard to help his parents and he was stuffing the rakings into jack-o-lantern patterned bags. While he worked along, I sat in the beautiful fall air studying a college psychology assignment.

As he worked, Paul stopped and looked over my shoulder. "What are you reading, Aunt Brenda?" When I told him I was studying psychology he said, "what is THAT?" I put it in simple terms to him, "psychology is a study about why people behave the way they do." At that response, Paul got a puzzled look on his face and asked me, "WHY do you need to study that, Aunt Brenda? You already KNOW why people behave the way they do. It started with Adam and Eve. . ." My thought was, "that little kid is smarter than I am!" He simply stated the obvious when he made that reference to the fact that people behave the way we do because we are all sinners.

Next time I mistreat you in some way or the next time I don't like what you have said or done, let us both remember that Jesus said to forgive others as God has forgiven us. Did He forgive us because we deserve it? NO. I am not better than you and you are no better than I. We both deserve eternal separation from God, but He freely forgave us because of His mercy, love, and grace.

From James 4:  "Don’t speak evil against each other, dear brothers and sisters. If you criticize and judge each other, then you are criticizing and judging God’s law. But your job is to obey the law, not to judge whether it applies to you. God alone, who gave the law, is the Judge. He alone has the power to save or to destroy. So what right do you have to judge your neighbor?"

Not a suggestion! Forgiveness is required of us.