Is It Wrong To Be Angry?

Have I ever made you really, really angry?  REALLY angry! Although I do not know the answer to that question, I am sure of one thing. If we are around each other long enough, I will at least disappoint you or do something that causes you to be hurt or to be angry with me. Why? Because I have a miserable, old sin nature and still struggle with it. (So do you.) 

What will make you angry with me? It may be a misunderstanding or it may be a broken promise. Something might be lost, damaged, or not returned. Thoughtless words may be said. There could be an argument and bitter words may be exchanged. Maybe I will lose my patience and hurt your feelings. It is hard to know, but sooner or later I will do something that is not right. And when that happens, you will be hurt or angry.

Is it wrong to be angry? No. There are times that we should be angry. We should be angry when someone robs a bank, wantonly destroys property, injures someone willfully, or does something unjust. But God has something to say about our anger and our response to it. There is a right way and a wrong way to be angry. 

• The Bible says to be angry and sin not.
• God has told us not to let the sun go down on our wrath (intense anger).
• Jesus said that if we hate another we have committed murder in our hearts.
• God says that vengeance belongs to HIM. He is the one who judges and exercises justice.
• We are to forgive others as GOD has forgiven us.
• We are not to allow ourselves to become bitter and hold grudges.  

Jesus has some sobering words for us in Matthew six. In the fourteenth and fifteenth verses He says, "For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you,  but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." Wow!

The first reason to forgive is in obedience to God. Another reason is to keep our relationships among one another honorable. For example, if at all possible we are to live at peace with everyone. We also forgive others for our own sake. Even if I don't want to make things right with you, forgive me for your own peace of mind.

Let's always bear in mind what God's Word has to say to us and let's lean on the Lord to help us live in obedience to it. In Ephesians four (NLT) we read: "Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.  And do not bring sorrow to God’s Holy Spirit by the way you live. Remember, he has identified you as his own, guaranteeing that you will be saved on the day of redemption.
Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you." 

Oh, My! How Do We Do That?

Chris, Bethany, Rachel, and David

"Dear children, let’s not merely say that we love each other; let us show the truth by our actions.  Our actions will show that we belong to the truth. . . " (From I John 3  NLT)

Time and time again we are told in the Bible how important it is that we love one another. It is clear that one of the marks of the Christian is that we love others -- and show it. Jesus said that others would know we are His disciples when they see how we love each other. In other words, it is a critical testimony before the world that we love one another sincerely.

Take a look at this little group of family members above. It is pretty clear to me that they love each other dearly. But at times it is even tough to love our own family -- people can really get under our skin.  We cannot write them off, though, if we are truly Christians. It is hard to love our family and friends unconditionally, but Jesus went a step further and gave us one of the toughest rules of all. He said to love our enemies, show kindness to those who are mean and cruel to us. Oh, MY! How do we do that?

This is another example of our own frailty. We do not have it in us to live in obedience to Him. Yet, the quandary comes back to what Jesus also said, "if you love me, KEEP my commandments." We might be thinking, "OK, Lord, we get it but we are weak." Jesus has the answer to that. We must not rely on ourselves, our "smarts", our own self discipline. We are to depend upon HIM and His grace to live in obedience to His clear call to us. How? It seems impossible! The apostle Paul wrote in regard to his own frustration about a personal hindrance in his life: "But [Jesus] said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.'” (II Corinthians 12:9)  Later on, Paul must have experienced some victory, for he wrote, "I can do ALL things through Christ, who strengthens me." (Philippians 4:13). 

Today I urge you and me to repent from any anger, resentment, or grudges that we have been holding. Let us fall upon Christ to renew His own, pure love that He has "shed abroad" in our hearts. And may we determine to draw upon HIS grace to help us demonstrate our discipleship through loving one another as we depend upon Him to enable us to do so.

Let's look at a portion of the Love Chapter (I Corinthians 13) from a modern paraphrase and yield to the Holy Spirit to make it true of each and every one who knows Jesus as Savior and Lord:

Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have.
Love doesn’t strut,
Doesn’t have a swelled head,
Doesn’t force itself on others,
Isn’t always “me first,”
Doesn’t fly off the handle,
Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn’t revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end. . . .
Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly.

 

We ALL Have a Past

David Peeking At Us Over His Mom's Shoulder

This is for the young -- but also for mothers of the young as you think of teaching and helping your own sons and daughters.

Do you have an innate ability to "blow it", "mess up", SIN? I do.

 Did you ever say something or do something and think, "I don't know how I will ever be able to show my face again?" If you are human and a bit older than David was in this picture, you have probably felt that way more than once. I certainly have.

Once when one of our children was disciplined for some infraction that has escaped my memory now, the tearful response was to blame Adam and Eve for his or her own childhood frailty. I am that way, too: prone to think or say it was someone else's fault. You have been there, done that also. Human nature is, after all, universal. As a friend of mine says, "we are all made of the same, old cookie dough!"

It is not my intent to say you are not alone in order to give you comfort in your own foolishness and sinful nature. But it is my intent to give you hope. The Bible says that all have sinned and come short of the glory of God. Yes, we have, and we know it. We all have a past and most of us are living with some regrets. The GOOD news is that there is forgiveness with God. There is NO SIN, no wrong thought, no bad deed, no terrible action that is too big for God. He has the answer to every one of your regrets.

The reason for writing about this topic was generated today about something a family member wrote after seeing an old photograph of herself: "This is the age that I thought I had it all figured out...I did not want to listen to my parents. I took my youth and beauty and I sold it to the lowest bidder (the highest bidder would have honored me more and cherished my purity). It's a little difficult to look at these pictures and then look at todays girls and see them make the same horrid mistakes I made. I did notice how I am still sitting like a Lady as [my mother] rightly taught me. How I pray that todays young  ladies would know their worth and compromise nothing. . . I just wish young [people] would trust those of us who have gone before them. . . I guess all I can say is 'just don't do it.'"

When I read of that sorrow, I just wanted to reach out and hug the author. I also wanted to reach out and hug all the Christian kids who are being wrongfully influenced by the philosophies of this world that are so opposed to God's absolute truth. The ideas and the behaviors being touted by this world -- and even by some professed Christians -- have fleeting pleasures that ultimately lead to pain and regret. "Flee youthful lusts," as the Bible warns. I beg you to do that.

A wise lady in our family wrote today: "God's plan is for those who know us best, who know our weaknesses and particular struggles with sin, to guide us during those years when decisions are made that can set the whole course of a life. Girls need protection, and girls need to love protection and not chafe against it. Satan sends some of his most potent weapons into that time when weakness seems so strong to so many. Pride is a big danger, not only pride not to listen, but also pride as adults who -don't know us like our parents do- try to step into God's order and replace it with their ideas of a better, more sophisticated plan."

Romans 12:1-2:  " And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him.  Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect. (NLT)

Our Family Needs Dad!

"Hear, my son, your father's instruction, and forsake not your mother's teaching, for they are a graceful garland for your head and pendants for your neck." (Proverbs 1:8-9 ESV)

Today I am speaking to our children and grandchildren but anyone else is welcome to follow along if you wish. Why? Well, tomorrow is Father's Day. One Sunday every year we honor Dad. We might send him a card, call him on the telephone, make a visit to him, take him out to lunch, buy him a gift, or figure out some other way to let him know that we love him and appreciate him. And we do, indeed, love and appreciate Dad!

Our family needs Dad every day, not just once a year. Therefore, we should never take him for granted. He is a gift of God to all of us -- his wife, his children, their spouses, and the grandchildren. He prays for us and he has our best interest at heart always. He loves us unconditionally and sacrificially. God has gifted him with wisdom and understanding. When we need advice, there is nobody better to ask than DAD. He is a Christian man, loves the Bible, and is very sincere in wanting to know and do the will of God. One thing we have heard from him many times is, "do the right thing BECAUSE it is the right thing!" He wants us to simply live in obedience to the Lord without expecting any recognition. 

We all know the Bible says that we are to honor our parents -- Dad and Mom. I believe that means to love them, respect them, show concern for them, and maybe it means even more than that. God's commandment to honor our parents is unconditional. Sometimes we might be tempted to dishonor them when they fail us in some way -- or when they sin. We are tempted to forget during the difficult times that are sure to come that we have the very parents that GOD wants us to have. We might wish our parents were more like someone else's. In times of stress and disappointment, we can easily forget to be thankful for them. Every one of us needs God's help to be faithful to one another in our family -- Dad, Mom, and Siblings.

Before the summer is over, Dad and I will celebrate fifty years as husband and wife. After all these years, I know him and I know his heart. That means I can tell you for sure that this is Dad's heartbeat for you: "I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth." (III John 1:4  ESV)

A fervent prayer of your Dad (or your grandfather) is that all of YOU will follow the Lord Jesus Christ. He wants to know that you are trusting Him as your Savior and that you are becoming the people that you were created to be. God has truly blessed our family by giving you this Dad! This Father's Day, talk to him about Jesus. He will love it!

Hand Out or Hands On?

Hands On!

"For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.'  But if you bite and devour one another, watch out that you are not consumed by one another. . . . If we live by the Spirit, let us also keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another."

How do we love our neighbors as ourselves? This is a question that I have pondered for many years because it is important for us to KNOW and DO what Jesus was teaching when he said that ALL the law and prophets can really be summed up in two commands: First, love God with all that we have and all that we are. And second, love our neighbor as ourselves.

All of us have neighbors who are in need. We know people who have physical needs, material needs, spiritual needs. Many of us really want to help. But we have a problem with knowing how we can help those who are needy. Too few of us have learned to help others in a way that does not dehumanize them and rob them of dignity.

Recently, I have become more and more convinced by things that I have seen and heard that the key to loving our neighbors as ourselves is to build friendships with them. Let them know that they are truly valued as real people, not just projects that need to be handled (or even worse, problems to be solved). 

Just yesterday Heather and I listened to a testimonial by a woman who had been living as a prostitute in order to support her drug habit. But people came into her life and cared about her in the way that Jesus taught. She was liberated from the drugs and the prostitution and she was spiritually born into the family of God. With palpable joy, she spoke of what a wonderful feeling it was to give gifts and tithes for the first time from her own pay check. She was motivated by the love of God and others when she felt valued and began to realize that she could learn to live a productive life and support herself.

I chose the picture above of two grandchildren making a nice dinner casserole. They had a ball working together with their hands. At the end of the evening, it was more than obvious that this meal was better "hands on" than as if someone else had made it and served it as a "hand out"! It illustrates the value of relationships and the value of creative work.

Let's pray for godly and creative ways to love and encourage others around us so that we really DO love our neighbors as ourselves.